Picking up A FENCE.

I have a confession to make. Last week, I picked up an offense. Now, you might ask, "Do you mean someone offended you?" and a part of me still wants to say "Yes, someone did something that hurt my feelings and offended me, and at the same time I was really, really mad and really, really sad," but, the truth of the matter is that, even though there is some truth to that statement, it doesn't really tell the whole story.

But that's how it works isn't it? You get upset about something, rightfully or wrongfully, and as a result, you give all the blame, all the fault, all the wrong doing to the offender. The problem with that is that when you do that, you also give them all the power. The power to hurt you, the power to control the tone or rhythm of your day, the power to control your emotions, and in some cases to control your effectiveness, efficiency and things as basic as your ability to eat (or stop eating) or sleep. That's a lot of power to give to someone, especially when, if the fault was unintentional, you're giving them power they don't want, and if it IS intentional, you're giving them power they don't deserve.

The truth of the matter is YOU have the power. I was studying scripture on the subject and found something interesting. The Bible does talk about offending others, but it NEVER talks about "being" offended or "getting" offended, but rather about TAKING offense. There is a major difference there. You see, when you "are" or "get" offended, you are using a passive form of the verb... you aren't active, you don't do things, but rather, things happen TO you. When you TAKE offense, you are doing the work. You are making the decision about whether or not you are going to let this thing get to you and you are going to surrender your power and GIVE it or them authority over you.

I named this post "picking up a fence" because when we take offense we do pick up a fence. We pick up an emotional fence that separates us from peace, and joy, and effectiveness, and wholeness.

Does that mean we are never going to take up an offense. Of course not, we're human. Things will get to us. We just need to have a healthy and honest perspective about what that means and who is REALLY in control.

Who has control over your emotions in YOUR life?